What:

I thought I had a few left to give. I could have sworn I saw them the other day, when my kids were climbing on me during a Zoom call. Or maybe they were somewhere in that pile of toys in the corner. (Or is that laundry? Who can tell anymore?) But nope, it turns out there was only one, single, solitary f*ck that I had left to give. And now it's on fire, so I'm all out. Gotta say, though — it smells lovely.

Wear:

• 13.75 oz
• All Natural Soy Wax Blend
• 60-80 hour burn time
• Hand Poured in the USA
• Available in 7 custom Scary Mommy Scents

1. The Next-Best-Thing to Clean Laundry  (Warm Cotton)
2. Go-Ask-Your-Dad Vanilla (Vanilla Teakwood)
3. Zen AF (Calming Lavender)
4. Mimosa & Chill (Mandarin, Lemon Flower, Magnolia)
5. Flowers, My Second Favorite F Word (Peony, Bergamot, Jasmine Noir)
6. Cinnamon and Settle-Down Now(Cinnamon with notes of Citron, Brown Sugar, & Nutmeg)

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

Shipping: Ship times quoted in checkout are estimates of time in transit after your product leaves the fulfillment center. Some items in your order may ship separately to arrive faster.

What:

Think of this warm, flickering flame as a soothing, beautifully-scented way of me saying "LEAVE ME ALONE!" I need a break. If the light is on, I'm off. Get it?

Wear:

• 13.75 oz
• All Natural Soy Wax Blend
• 60-80 hour burn time
• Hand Poured in the USA
• Available in 7 custom Scary Mommy Scents

1. The Next-Best-Thing to Clean Laundry   (Warm Cotton)
2. Go-Ask-Your-Dad Vanilla (Vanilla Teakwood)
3. Zen AF (Calming Lavender)
4. Mimosa & Chill (Mandarin, Lemon Flower, Magnolia)
5. Flowers, My Second Favorite F Word (Peony, Bergamot, Jasmine Noir)
6. Cinnamon and Settle-Down Now(Cinnamon with notes of Citron, Brown Sugar, & Nutmeg)

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

Shipping: Ship times quoted in checkout are estimates of time in transit after your product leaves the fulfillment center. Some items in your order may ship separately to arrive faster.

What: 

Moms need to de-stress more than anyone in the world. These candles deliver a laugh along with a soothing scent.

Wear:

• 3 candles with our custom Scary Mommy Scents

1. Pretend I did The Laundry candle (Clean Laundry Scent)
2. Go-Ask-Your-Dad-Vanilla (Vanilla Sandalwood Scent)
3. Out of Service Candle with a Scent of Zen AF (Calming Lavender Scent)

• 13.75 oz each
• All Natural Soy Wax Blend
• 60-80 hour burn time each
• Hand Poured in the USA

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

What:

At any given moment, a mom’s brain is overflowing with fifty trillion items of varying importance. To-do lists, mental notes, small moments of gratitude we want to hold on to, what we should have said in that conversation 3 weeks ago, upcoming appointments, and colorful swear words all swirling in a perpetual tornado of overwhelming brain noise. This unique, funny pink notebook is the refuge she needs to unload the $%#@storm without filters or judgment. Brimming with hilarious encouragement for kick-ass moms whose goal is not perfection, but making it to the end of the damn day.

Mom's Planning and Profanity Notebook is the perfect companion for Moms with its clearly laid out sections for lists, gratitude, venting, and notes sprinkled with humor and uplifting messages that resonate. It’s cheaper than therapy and funnier too.

Looking for a perfect Mother’s Day gift under $20? Look no more, this unique and useful (!) gift for mom will make this Mother's Day feel extra special.

Wear:

• 128 pages
• 7" x 9"
• 4 sections: Lists, Gratitude, Venting, & Notes

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

What:

Why have a nervous breakdown when you can have a nervous burndown. If this candle’s alighted you should probably be affrighted. Don’t worry, nerves regenerate, but it’s gonna be a minute.

Wear:

• 13.75 oz
• All Natural Soy Wax Blend
• 60-80 hour burn time
• Hand Poured in the USA
• Available in 7 custom Scary Mommy Scents

1. The Next-Best-Thing to Clean Laundry  (Warm Cotton)
2. Go-Ask-Your-Dad Vanilla (Vanilla Teakwood)
3. Zen AF (Calming Lavender)
4. Mimosa & Chill (Mandarin, Lemon Flower, Magnolia)
5. Sage Against The Machine (Sage, Amber, Oak Moss)
6. Flowers, My Second Favorite F Word (Peony, Bergamot, Jasmine Noir)

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

Shipping: Ship times quoted in checkout are estimates of time in transit after your product leaves the fulfillment center. Some items in your order may ship separately to arrive faster.

What:

When you need to get the bad energy the fuck out of your face, light this candle. Inhale its soothing scent, exhale the bullshit. Repeat as necessary

Wear:

• 13.75 oz
• All Natural Soy Wax Blend
• 60-80 hour burn time
• Hand Poured in the USA
• Available in our custom Scary Mommy "Sage Against The Machine" scent (Sage, Amber, Oak Moss)

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

Shipping: Ship times quoted in checkout are estimates of time in transit after your product leaves the fulfillment center. Some items in your order may ship separately to arrive faster.

What:

How’s it going? It’s GOING. How’s my day? It’s been a fucking DAY. When mom is answering questions like this, do something helpful or go into hiding. Preferably both.

Wear:

• 13.75 oz
• All Natural Soy Wax Blend
• 60-80 hour burn time
• Hand Poured in the USA
• Available in 6 custom Scary Mommy Scents

1. The Next-Best-Thing to Clean Laundry  (Warm Cotton)
2. Go-Ask-Your-Dad Vanilla (Vanilla Teakwood)
3. Zen AF (Calming Lavender)
4. Mimosa & Chill (Mandarin, Lemon Flower, Magnolia)
5. Sage Against The Machine (Sage, Amber, Oak Moss)
6. Flowers, My Second Favorite F Word (Peony, Bergamot, Jasmine Noir)

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

Shipping: Ship times quoted in checkout are estimates of time in transit after your product leaves the fulfillment center. Some items in your order may ship separately to arrive faster.

What:

This mom is fleek, crunk and BAE-sically going to fleek the crunk out on everybody, fam. Moms don’t need to wait for the weekend to get lit, we’re lit(erally losing our shit) all day every day.

Wear:

• 13.75 oz
• All Natural Soy Wax Blend
• 60-80 hour burn time
• Hand Poured in the USA
• Available in 6 custom Scary Mommy Scents

1. The Next-Best-Thing to Clean Laundry  (Warm Cotton)
2. Go-Ask-Your-Dad Vanilla (Vanilla Teakwood)
3. Zen AF (Calming Lavender)
4. Mimosa & Chill (Mandarin, Lemon Flower, Magnolia)
5. Sage Against The Machine (Sage, Amber, Oak Moss)
6. Flowers, My Second Favorite F Word (Peony, Bergamot, Jasmine Noir)

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

Shipping: Ship times quoted in checkout are estimates of time in transit after your product leaves the fulfillment center. Some items in your order may ship separately to arrive faster.

What:

I thought I had a few left to give. I could have sworn I saw them the other day, when my kids were climbing on me during a Zoom call. Or maybe they were somewhere in that pile of toys in the corner. (Or is that laundry? Who can tell anymore?) But nope, it turns out there was only one, single, solitary f*ck that I had left to give. And now it's on fire, so I'm all out. Gotta say, though — it smells lovely.

Wear:

• 13.75 oz
• All Natural Soy Wax Blend
• 60-80 hour burn time
• Hand Poured in the USA
• Available in 7 custom Scary Mommy Scents

1. The Next-Best-Thing to Clean Laundry   (Warm Cotton)
2. Go-Ask-Your-Dad Vanilla (Vanilla Teakwood)
3. Zen AF (Calming Lavender)
4. Mimosa & Chill (Mandarin, Lemon Flower, Magnolia)
5. Sage Against The Machine (Sage, Amber, Oak Moss)
6. Flowers, My Second Favorite F Word (Peony, Bergamot, Jasmine Noir)

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

Shipping: Ship times quoted in checkout are estimates of time in transit after your product leaves the fulfillment center. Some items in your order may ship separately to arrive faster.

What:

Don’t like the way your sandwich is cut? Upset your favorite shirt isn’t clean? Prefer the vacuum isn’t used while you’re watching TV? Please, by all means, write it all down and hold it over this flame.

Wear:

• 13.75 oz
• All Natural Soy Wax Blend
• 60-80 hour burn time
• Hand Poured in the USA
• Available in 6 custom Scary Mommy Scents

1. The Next-Best-Thing to Clean Laundry  (Warm Cotton)
2. Go-Ask-Your-Dad Vanilla (Vanilla Teakwood)
3. Zen AF (Calming Lavender)
4. Mimosa & Chill (Mandarin, Lemon Flower, Magnolia)
5. Sage Against The Machine (Palo Santo & Sage)
6. Flowers, My Second Favorite F Word (Peony, Bergamot, Jasmine Noir)

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

Shipping: Ship times quoted in checkout are estimates of time in transit after your product leaves the fulfillment center. Some items in your order may ship separately to arrive faster.

What:

Sometimes you deal with so much bullshit you need to put up a smoke signal, or at least an aromatherapeutic scent signal so everyone can get the message: HELP! I just do not give a shit anymore!

Wear:

• 13.75 oz
• All Natural Soy Wax Blend
• 60-80 hour burn time
• Hand Poured in the USA
• Available in 7 custom Scary Mommy Scents

1. The Next-Best-Thing to Clean Laundry  (Warm Cotton)
2. Go-Ask-Your-Dad Vanilla (Vanilla Teakwood)
3. Zen AF (Calming Lavender)
4. Mimosa & Chill (Mandarin, Lemon Flower, Magnolia)
5. Sage Against The Machine (Sage, Amber, Oak Moss)
6. Flowers, My Second Favorite F Word (Peony, Bergamot, Jasmine Noir)

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

Shipping: Ship times quoted in checkout are estimates of time in transit after your product leaves the fulfillment center. Some items in your order may ship separately to arrive faster.

What:

Sometimes life feels like a thousand-piece puzzle, only my kids lost the box so I’m not even sure what we’re supposed to be building anymore. Which is exactly why moms need a puzzle we can actually fucking solve..

Wear:

• 252 pieces
• 10.5" x 13.5"
• Packed in custom tin

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

What:

Even the world’s worst homeschool teacher deserves recognition. We didn’t sign up for this shit, but we survived it.

Wear:

• 11 oz stoneware
• Glossy white 
• dishwasher and microwave safe

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

What:

Think of this as the adult version of plugging your ears and shouting, “I’M NOT LISTENING!”  

Wear:

• 11 oz stoneware
• Glossy black
• dishwasher and microwave safe

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

What:

When you live with kids, the threat of disaster is always looming. You have to celebrate your wins, and making it to the end of the day: huge win.

The details:

• 13.75 oz
• All Natural Soy Wax Blend
• 60-80 hour burn time
• Hand Poured in the USA
• Available in 5 custom Dad Scents

1. The Next-Best-Thing to Clean Laundry   (Warm Cotton)
2. Go-Ask-Your-Dad Vanilla (Vanilla Teakwood)
3. Zen AF (Calming Lavender)
4. Mimosa & Chill (Mandarin, Lemon Flower, Magnolia)
5. Sage Against The Machine (Sage, Amber, Oak Moss)

The delight:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE high fives from other dudes who know the deal

What: 

Awesome shit for moms who’ve put up with too much shit, lost their shit, and don’t give a shit anymore.

Wear:

• 3 candles with our custom Scary Mommy Scents

1. This Mom is Lit with a Scent of Flowers, My Second Favorite F Word ( Peony, Bergamot, Jasmine Noir )
2. I Can't Talk Right Now. I'm Doin' Hot Mom Shit With a Scent of Mimosa & Chill ( Mandarin, Lemon Flower, Magnolia)
3. S.O.S. Candle With a Scent of Sage Against The Machine (Sage, Amber, Oak Moss)

• 13.75 oz each
• All Natural Soy Wax Blend
• 60-80 hour burn time each
• Hand Poured in the USA

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

What:

From the creators of updog, The Dad is (maybe a little too) proud to present Deez Nuts. A scent everyone will enjoy, complete with a scents of humor dad will enjoy.

Wear:

• Available in our custom "Deez Nuts" blend: Almond, coconut, and pralines mixed with caramel, honey, and brown sugar.
• 13.75 oz
• All Natural Soy Wax Blend
• 60-80 hour burn time
• Hand Poured in the USA

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other dads who know the struggle is real

what:

The perfect gift for a mom who could really use a damn break. When she's under this blanket napping or watching her shows, she is not to be disturbed. Dad can deal with it.

The details:

• 50 X 60
• Midweight soft fleece
• Polyester

The delight:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE high fives from other dudes who know the deal

This item is not guaranteed to arrive by Father's Day (6/20). Please note that purchasing this item will affect your whole order and it will not be guaranteed for delivery by Father's Day (6/20).

what:

It may look he's napping on the couch and it may even sound like he's snoring, but dad is always "just resting his eyes." And don't even think about trying to change the channel, he was watching that.

The details:

• 50 X 60
• Midweight soft fleece
• Polyester

The delight:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE high fives from other dudes who know the deal

What:

We’ve all been there. Reading the same sentence for the 10th time without taking any of it in because your beloved family just won’t STFU. Light this candle, get lost in your book. We got you.

Wear:

• Custom Scary Mommy Book Club Scent "A Stack of Unread Books": Orange Zest, Amber, Clove Leaf, and Balsam
• 13.75 oz
• All Natural Soy Wax Blend
• 60-80 hour burn time
• Hand Poured in the USA

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

What:

The real happy hour for parents is the little celebratory window when the kids are finally in bed (at least for now.) Cheers to having some kid-free time! Enjoy it while it lasts.

Wear:

• 12 oz vacuum insulated stainless steel
• Glossy white 
• dishwasher and microwave safe

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

What:

After all these years and all the sh*t you've been through, you still like each other? It defies all logic! But it's pretty damn cool.

Wear:

• 13.75 oz
• All Natural Soy Wax Blend
• 60-80 hour burn time
• Hand Poured in the USA
• Available in 8 custom Scary Mommy Scents

1. The Next-Best-Thing to Clean Laundry   (Warm Cotton)
2. Go-Ask-Your-Dad Vanilla (Vanilla Teakwood)
3. Zen AF (Calming Lavender)
4. Flowers, My Second Favorite F Word (Peony, Bergamot, Jasmine Noir)
5. Mimosa & Chill (Mandarin, Lemon Flower, Magnolia)
6. Cinnamon and Settle-Down Now(Cinnamon with notes of Citron, Brown Sugar, & Nutmeg)
7. Shit, It's Cold (Winter Breeze with notes of Peppermint, Mountain Cypress, & Mint Leaves)

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

What:

Sure the house is a mess and everything is chaos but look, a pretty candle. Romantic right? Maybe this is the best you can do right now and honestly, it's the romantic thought that counts.

Wear:

• 13.75 oz
• All Natural Soy Wax Blend
• 60-80 hour burn time
• Hand Poured in the USA
• Available in 8 custom Scary Mommy Scents

1. The Next-Best-Thing to Clean Laundry   (Warm Cotton)
2. Go-Ask-Your-Dad Vanilla (Vanilla Teakwood)
3. Zen AF (Calming Lavender)
4. Flowers, My Second Favorite F Word (Peony, Bergamot, Jasmine Noir)
5. Mimosa & Chill (Mandarin, Lemon Flower, Magnolia)
6. Cinnamon and Settle-Down Now(Cinnamon with notes of Citron, Brown Sugar, & Nutmeg)
7. Shit, It's Cold (Winter Breeze with notes of Peppermint, Mountain Cypress, & Mint Leaves)

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

What:

It's that "special" time of day when you can finally have a moment free of the kids to reconnect as a couple...or just fall asleep on the couch watching Netflix.

Wear:

• 13.75 oz
• All Natural Soy Wax Blend
• 60-80 hour burn time
• Hand Poured in the USA
• Available in 8 custom Scary Mommy Scents

1. The Next-Best-Thing to Clean Laundry   (Warm Cotton)
2. Go-Ask-Your-Dad Vanilla (Vanilla Teakwood)
3. Zen AF (Calming Lavender)
4. Flowers, My Second Favorite F Word (Peony, Bergamot, Jasmine Noir)
5. Mimosa & Chill (Mandarin, Lemon Flower, Magnolia)
6. Shit, It's Cold (Winter Breeze with notes of Peppermint, Mountain Cypress, & Mint Leaves)
7. Cinnamon and Settle-Down Now(Cinnamon with notes of Citron, Brown Sugar, & Nutmeg)

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

What:

You don't need some bullsh*t holiday to know that you love each other, but a little reminder never hurts. Especially when it smells this good.

Wear:

• 13.75 oz
• All Natural Soy Wax Blend
• 60-80 hour burn time
• Hand Poured in the USA
• Available in 5 custom Scary Mommy Scents

1. The Next-Best-Thing to Clean Laundry   (Warm Cotton)
2. Go-Ask-Your-Dad Vanilla (Vanilla Teakwood)
3. Zen AF (Calming Lavender)
4. Flowers, My Second Favorite F Word (Peony, Bergamot, Jasmine Noir)
5. Mimosa & Chill (Mandarin, Lemon Flower, Magnolia)

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

 The design:

If life was a video game, you'd be the beat-up hero on the edge of collapsing. Stop, drink, and revive yourself so you can keep fighting another day.

The details:

• 16 oz vacuum insulated stainless steel
• Glossy white 
• dishwasher and microwave safe

The delight:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE high fives from other dudes who know the deal

This Item is not guaranteed to arrive by Mother's Day (5/9). Please note purchasing this item will effect your whole order and it will not be guaranteed for delivery by Mother's Day (5/9) 

 The design:

The details:

• 16 oz vacuum insulated stainless steel
• Glossy white 
• dishwasher and microwave safe

The delight:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE high fives from other dudes who know the deal

The design:

Dad's never let their joke fuel tank run on empty. Drink up and pun on, fellow dads.

The details:

• 16 oz vacuum insulated stainless steel
• Glossy white 
• dishwasher and microwave safe

The delight:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE high fives from other dudes who know the deal

 The design:

Dads love to brag about how early they got up. They say "good afternoon" to anyone who gets up after 9 am. Now you can smugly sip from this mug and judge all those late birds who definitely won't catch the worm.

The details:

• 11 oz ceramic mug
• Glossy white 
• dishwasher and microwave safe

The delight:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE high fives from other dudes who know the deal

This Item is not guaranteed to arrive by Mother's Day (5/9). Please note purchasing this item will effect your whole order and it will not be guaranteed for delivery by Mother's Day (5/9) 

The design:

If life was a video game, you'd be the beat-up hero on the edge of collapsing. Stop, drink, and revive yourself so you can keep fighting another day.

The details:

• 11 oz ceramic mug
• Glossy white 
• dishwasher and microwave safe

The delight:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE high fives from other dudes who know the deal

The design:

Sometimes after a particularly good dad joke, you just need to pause and take a victory sip to celebrate the moment.

The details:

• 11 oz ceramic mug
• Glossy white 
• dishwasher and microwave safe

The delight:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE high fives from other dudes who know the deal

The design:

Dad's never let their joke fuel tank run on empty. Drink up and pun on, fellow dads.

The details:

• 11 oz ceramic mug
• Glossy white 
• dishwasher and microwave safe

The delight:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE high fives from other dudes who know the deal

What:

It happened again, I'm back on my bullshit. Consider this a warning.

Wear:

• 16 oz vacuum insulated stainless steel
• Glossy white 
• dishwasher and microwave safe

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

What:

This is the last straw, folks. If you're hanging by a thread here, fill this baby with iced coffee and tell everyone to stay back.

Wear:

• 20 oz acrylic tumbler
• Comes with straw
• Hand wash recommended
• Do not microwave

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

What:

This cup measures your mood depending on how much iced coffee you've had. The bad news is you drank the whole thing and you're still exhausted, because that's mom life for you.

Wear:

• 16 oz stainless steel
• Glossy white 
• dishwasher and microwave safe

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real