This item will begin to ship 12/8. Please also keep in mind that your ENTIRE order will ship at once — only after the pre-order items are ready to go.

What:

SOS, Mom is about to lose her shit. Consider this gift set an emergency kit for when she's down to her last f*ck. Give her this and back away slowly.

Wear:

Includes the following items:

• Calm Your Tits & Color adult coloring book
• Mom's Planning and Profanity Notebook
• Official Warning Notepad
• Out of Service candle with a scent of Go Ask Your Dad Vanilla (Vanilla Sandalwood) 

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

What: 

Commemorate the ultimate dumpster fire of a year by burning something. (The candles, we mean.)

Wear:

• 4 of our Scary Mommy candles saying how we all feel in 2020. All in Zen AF because that is what we need in 2020

1. 2020 oh look it is on fire candle
2. This is 'My Pretending Everything is Fine' candle
3. I Just Need Something to Burn candle
4. My Last Fuck candle 

• 13.75 oz each
• All Natural Soy Wax Blend
• 60-80 hour burn time each
• Hand Poured in the USA

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

This item will begin to ship 12/11. Please also keep in mind that your ENTIRE order will ship at once — only after the pre-order items are ready to go.

What: 

Moms need to de-stress more than anyone in the world. These candles deliver a laugh along with a soothing scent.

Wear:

• 3 candles with our custom Scary Mommy Scents

1. Pretend I did The Laundry candle (Clean Laundry Scent)
2. Go-Ask-Your-Dad-Vanilla (Vanilla Sandalwood Scent)
3. Out of Service Candle with a Scent of Zen AF (Calming Lavender Scent)

• 13.75 oz each
• All Natural Soy Wax Blend
• 60-80 hour burn time each
• Hand Poured in the USA

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real

Holiday candle orders will begin to ship 11/24. Please also keep in mind that your ENTIRE order will ship at once — only after the pre-order items are ready to go.

What: 

The perfect gifts for moms who love a certain F-word (hint: it isn't "festive.")

Wear:

• 4 of our favorite Winter candle and scent combos

1. O'Holy Fuck Candle With A Scent of Evergreen Tress & Sanity Please
2. Last Fucks Roasting On An Open Fire With A Scent of Spiced Holiday Stress
3. And It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Fuck This With A Scent of Festive AF
4. Silent Night Everyone STFU With A Scent of Shit, It's Cold

• 13.75 oz each
• All Natural Soy Wax Blend
• 60-80 hour burn time each
• Hand Poured in the USA
• Comes with 4 custom Scary Mommy Winter Scents

1. Evergreen Trees and Sanity Please (Evergreen Forest with notes of Balsam Fir, Eucalyptus, & Mistletoe Leaves)
2. Spiced Holiday Stress (Cinnamon with notes of Citron, Brown Sugar, & Nutmeg)
3. Festive AF (Celebratory Notes of Clove, Cedar, Amber, & Patchouli)
4. Shit, It's Cold (Winter Breeze with notes of Peppermint, Mountain Cypress, & Mint Leaves)

Why:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE compliments and nods of approval from other moms who know the struggle is real